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December 22, 2017

It’s not my problem – or is it?

You don’t have to share your list but somewhere either on paper or in your head, make a list of all the things you see as problems…..things you need to work through….things for which you need a resolution.  Now think of three problems that other people have that have now become your own because you listened, because you were that confidante, because you were the one the person saw as someone who could fix the problems they are having. Whose problems are now taking priority? And how is someone else feeling because you haven’t yet helped them to solve their problems?  Can’t it all become ever so much more overwhelming when you have other people’s problems to deal with thereby preventing you from clearing your plate and moving on?  I encourage you today to focus on what’s in your immediate zone of concern to fix in order to see your way clear to take a fresh step forward to do some of the things you want to do.

Encourage someone today by listing a suggestion of something simple and inexpensive that they can do leave problems behind in order to focus on no-one else but themselves.

10 Comments on “It’s not my problem – or is it?

Davika
December 22, 2017 at 2:22 am

I’m glad I read this post. Encouraging people to participate in self care is something I’m passionate about especially after my own experiences. One simple thing that I’ve started doing this year that has helped me to kind of leave my problems behind and de-stress is writing in my gratitude journal. I make a list of all the things I’m grateful for from that day and I try to think about something unique to each day. One more suggestion I have is taking a moment each day to be still and quiet and to listen to what your mind, body and soul has to say to you. It’s a simple way to connect with yourself and really check in with how you feel about what’s going on around you and then it can help you to think clearly about how to work through something as well.

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Shawnette Somner
December 22, 2017 at 2:33 am

Davika, I absolutely love this! You have given some very simple and practical ideas that can work and leave people feeling a sense of peace. I encourage YOU to continue writing. Focusing on the positive will keep you positive. Don’t look back!!

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Glenda Carlington
December 22, 2017 at 3:00 am

My prayer each morning is ‘Lord help me to be a blessing to someone today’. With that prayer i have lost a lot of ‘me time’. But it doesn’t matter because taking my eyes off of me and focusing on the needs of others gives me satisfaction that I have helped someone who may have been in despair. Is their problem my problem? To an extent yes… we are our brothers keeper. When one hurts we all hurt; when one rejoices we all rejoice; when one is in need we should all be there to help out. We need each other!

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Shawnette Somner
December 22, 2017 at 3:14 am

Absolutely, Glenda. You’re an angel for sure.

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Sacha
December 22, 2017 at 3:15 am

This blog is awesome as this is a struggle for me.. I deal with anxiety and I have always tried to help other people but always forget to do with the same advice I give to others for myself..
So my first suggestion for anyone who is dealing with anxiety and depression is to start exercising for at least 20 mins every day..
Another suggestion is to watch funny movies.. I know it doesn’t sound like much, but believe me..
It helps me..
Lastly, talk to God if you are a believer..and also constantly affirm yourself with things that you see yourself as.. eg. “I (your name) am a fearless and confident person”
Xx

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Shawnette Somner
December 22, 2017 at 3:17 am

Wow, Sacha! Great suggestions. I am glad you recognize the “problem” of anxiety and proud of you for doing something about it. Well done!

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Trina
December 22, 2017 at 3:54 am

Very important to do… and unfortunately most people don’t learn this until later in life. We have to first take care of ourselves before we can help anyone else. While on an airplane when they give the safety demonstration they tell you to put on your oxygen mask first then you can help others put on theirs. It is a very important life lesson.

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Shawnette Somner
December 22, 2017 at 3:57 am

What a great analogy, Trina! That analogy can serve as a great topic for so many things in life. I just might use it one day! Thanks for sharing.

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Martin B
December 22, 2017 at 11:48 am

Wholeheartedly agree with Trina’s comment above and love the oxygen mask analogy. We lead hectic lives today in which responses to problems are expected instantaneously. This is made worse by social media and e-mail, neither of which allow time for proper consideration or thought process. At the highest levels in our society we see people who think they can solve problems in 140 characters or less. They are wrong. I am a firm believer in the benefit of ‘sleeping on a problem’. Listen, digest but do not respond immediately. The value of your reply will be much greater if you have had time to consider it over night and to prioritise it within the bigger picture that is your life. Given this time, you may not even feel the need to respond at all…

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Shawnette Somner
December 22, 2017 at 12:10 pm

Absolutely, Martin! Oftentimes this “microwave society” with the expectation for everything instant can add more problems!! Thanks for your insight and I hope someone reading this will take time to think before reacting to solve. Less stress!

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