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December 9, 2018

Love – Nice or Hurtful?

This article is inspired by Oladapo Frederick.  He asked if I would write something on: “If love is so nice why does it hurt so bad.”  Here’s my take on it and I welcome your comment below.

“If love so nice, tell me why it hurt so bad?”  Personally I think most people have this whole notion of love twisted! Most people say they want love but then make definitions and demands that suit their own specific needs with little regard to the other person who will be part of this “love” equation.  The premise is that if s/he does this and if s/he does that – and does these things the way I want them done, then we’re good!  Love works! Love works well for most as long as things are going well.  We combine our life experiences with those of another person without the necessary communication that must be had consistently to make sure that the “love lines” are parallel.  And when things go awry, all of a sudden, it’s not love anymore.  Disdain and contempt enter quickly and all of a sudden love is not as beautiful as it pictured.  

I believe that love IS nice and it’s one of the things we are tasked to create and experience while on earth.  But like everything else, it takes work – lots of hard work – and communication along with a whole lot of understanding, giving and taking. Without the required efforts, love will hurt.  

5 Comments on “Love – Nice or Hurtful?

Dapo Frederick
December 9, 2018 at 11:34 pm

That is spot on my sister. Blessed is the one who expects nothing, for they won’t be disappointed!

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Rosa
December 10, 2018 at 7:13 am

I believe love is nice when given with the right intentions. We must truly, unconditionally & authentically love ourselves enough (flaws & all) before we can truly, unconditionally & authentically love someone else (flaws & all). It takes practice, intention & effort. When love starts to feel like abuse or pain we must first be aware & own it for what it is & not mistake love for pain. Our spirit lets us know the difference xo

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Patrice Lynch
December 10, 2018 at 8:37 am

Love truly is unconditional but as the brother said we expect love to suit us and if it doesn’t go that way we tend to lash out! True love gives and looks beyond faults! True love really doesn’t look for it in return because we know that to truly love is a gift! I ask… How can you truly love someone that you once adored and treasured? How can you love someone that hurt you badly?
The answer for me is God for while they may have hurt me badly I receive love in return from God and that is what mends my heart to love in spite of! Not to be used again but to free my heart to live beyond what has happened!

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Marsha Smith
December 10, 2018 at 9:25 am

LOVE is the most wonderful feeling but the most painful when it’s lost.

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Tina Laws
December 10, 2018 at 9:58 am

” If love so nice, tell me why it hurts so bad” Yess! This song took my back. Way back!. But yes, LOVE is an evolving experience. It’s great. Especially when you can reflect on your sacrifices a long the way. Love is an amazing experience.

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